Kent and Shannon Rollins on the Cowboy Coffee Hour podcast on YouTube.
I was on YouTube a few days ago and something popped up in my page and it made me smile. It was a podcast by Chuckwagon Cook Kent Rollins, and it was on cowboy superstitions. The “smile” part came because I flashed back to an earlier life and remembered how Rollins, a couple decades ago, used to banter with Bobby Newton, publisher and editor of a cowboy-themed newspaper called Rope Burns. In the pages of Rope Burns, Bobby would needle his friend Rollins, who even then was already a renowned chuckwagon cook, by referring to him as Kent “Rolaid” Rollins.
Bobby got those good natured jibe fests going with other cowboy figures he knew. Cowboy poet Les Buffham used to show up in the pages of Rope Burns regularly. Les would send a letter to the editor that Bobby would publish, and in the letter Les would try some playful mockery of Bobby, and then Bobby would wisecrack back at Les, labeling him (if I remember correctly) California Yuppie Cowboy Poet Les Buffham. (Buffham was the last person you’d think of a yuppie, but that was Bobby’s way.)
Nobody ever got the best of Bobby in these exchanges because, well, the whole thing was carried on in a newspaper owned and published by Bobby. One time I chimed in, telling Les (because I too knew Les) that he should never pick a fight with somebody who buys his ink by the barrel.
Anyway, Kent Rollins, who incidentally has more than three million subscribers on YouTube, had that podcast episode, and it made me think about oilfield superstitions. We’ll get to those soon, but first the cowboy stuff.
Kent and his wife Shannon were doing their “Cowboy Coffee Hour,” and Shannon was asking Kent what cowboys are superstitious about. The answer is… plenty.
“Never lay your cowboy hat on a bed,” Rollins said. “It’s a bad omen.”
In a half-hour’s time, he went through a spate of them. Hearing a hoot owl outside your house at night—somebody’s gonna die. If coyotes howl at midday—bad weather is coming. Don’t change the name of a horse—you’ll get bucked off. (Rollins recalled with a laugh that he remembered once riding with a man who said his horse’s name was Spongebob—it was a name the owner [a second owner] decided he couldn’t change.)
Don’t ride in another man’s saddle. Never wear another man’s hat. Bad luck. If someone gives you a knife, you must give them something—anything—for it, even a penny or a nickel. If you don’t, the knife will cut you.
Cause of consternation.
In rodeo, don’t wash your clothes during a winning streak. Also, if you step in manure back behind the chutes—it’s good luck.
The Oilfield Has Its Omens Too
But my main point this month is oilfield superstitions. And to tell about those, the best source is the workers themselves. On Reddit.com I found a subReddit (r/oilandgasworkers) where someone had posed this question:
Oilfield Myths, Superstitions, and Taboos—What Are Yours?
What follows is what visitors to the page said in reply. Each bullet represents a different voice.
* Newest guy on location spits on the packer/anchor before it goes in the well.
* Never say the word “early” in relation to how the day is going to go.
* Never put the elevators upside down on the ground.
* Never make plans before TD (total depth).
* I had one well where the other geo bought tickets to go skiing in Colorado. We ended up spending about 10 days—after we landed the curve—fishing, trying to get the pipe unstuck.
* You’re never supposed to clean your hard hat on location. It’s a disaster waiting to happen.
* I did that once. I ended up breaking my hand that day. Didn’t do it again for over a year. When I finally did, I broke my hand again. I don’t do that anymore.
* Just finished my first hitch. Guy offered to clean my helmet and me, not knowing better, said “Sure.” Next day I smash my finger, he quits, and the well kept shooting up oil based mud all over the floor and on the derrick, which I had to clean. Also as a bonus, a guy working nights didn’t check his valves on our vac and spewed oil based mud all under the rig. Never cleaning my helmet again, LOL.
* Every oilfield worker has their superstitions or taboos. For me it’s cherry pies. And not just any random cherry pies. It has to be those gross Hostess pocket cherry pies. Don’t ever bring cherry pies onto my location or something bad is going down. Maybe a rock in the blender, screen out downhole, you name it.
* The cherry pie thing is real, man.
* Yep, I was with a guy that had gone his whole career without clipping a well. Some new guy that just got hired bought a cherry pie at the corner store before we went out to the well site. Guess what!! We clipped the #$&@ out of that well. (CLIP = Cement Left In Pipe.) All sorts of bizarre s#$% happened that day.
* I was with frac and we had s@#% go down when a guy brought a McDonald’s cherry pie in!! We didn’t know he had one on site at first… came out later in an “ah-ha!” moment.
* I’m in exploration and finance. Never name a new well after your wife.
* No eating in the wireline truck before we reach TD. Otherwise we’ll bridge off or get stuck or have tool problems downhole.
* If you run a cement job during the day, it won’t pass the integrity test.
* Cement pumped during daylight never sets up.
* Never make plans for after work, or else we’ll be pulling an 18+ hour shift.
* Don’t say “fish” or “stuck.”
* When I was rig moving my apprentice (swamper) would light the smokes for both of us while I drove the crane to location and on the way back I’d light them. His way of saying don’t drive this 270-ton crane off the road and kill us before we get there. And on the way back it was my way of saying thanks for him not #$@%ing up and having us kill someone while on location. We worked together three years before I moved onto another outfit. I’m proud do say he is now running my old machine with a new apprentice and carrying on our old tradition.
* This is pretty common but if anyone talks about how easy the day is going or how much progress we’re making, the entire room will glare at them.
* In wireline, don’t eat [while] fishing. Don’t check your fishing gears before the job; instead, check it afterwards for the next upcoming job.
* Never leave the elevators upside down. Always spit on the anchor and pump after make up. No Kit Kat bars, cherry pies.
* Never give greeners the new tools fresh out the box or they’ll have the sloppy greener curse for as long as you use them.
* If you mention coil, coil will come.
The Moral
When someone says watch out, watch out. And keep the elevators right side up!
Jesse Mullins, Editor
Jesse Mullins, editor of Permian Basin Oil and Gas Magazine, caught his share of jibes from Bobby Newton but lives to tell the tales.
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